Dumped On...

This past Saturday, Nate and I did what we always do...got up early and hit the yard sales.  I had checked the weather for the day and it was to be clear, sunny skies all morning with big storms hitting around 2pm.  We are in the habit of taking our Jeep Wrangler when we yard sale and so this morning was no different.  However, because there were so many sales, we felt like we shouldn't take the door to the Jeep, because they would just take up space, so we left them at home...and then we unzipped the windows off...and rolled up the back window...Yeah.  Let's just say the storm decided to hit when we least expected it, out of no where, just when we were almost home.  We were literally about a half mile from our house.  Well, there wasn't a whole lot we could do other than wait it out.  We were stuck at a light, it was monsooning (I am making that word up) all around us, it was raining sideways into our Jeep soaking us completely, there was a sign blowing so hard that I thought it would break off and come reeling in towards our heads through our empty window...and everyone looked at us like we were fools.  We had no options.  By the time we made it home (thank you light for staying red for 10 minutes), we were soaking wet and had about an inch of rain on the floor of the Jeep...and it was still raining as we attempted to put the doors and windows back on.

The past two weeks of my life have felt a lot like that experience in the Jeep last Saturday.  A couple of weeks ago, I was finding myself so much at peace with this process, so much at peace with the wait, and even anticipating and expecting God to do something amazing in the weeks to come.  I felt like God was really fighting for us.  And then...we got the news that our wait time is going to be extended..AGAIN.  We don't even know how long the extension is going to be, we will find that out sometime this week.   On top of that, there seems to be a lot of other stuff that is being thrown my way, things I don't have the liberty to blog about, things that just leave me feeling like I am stuck in a Jeep, getting dumped on, with no options.

My first instinct is to complain.  To question.  To doubt.  To cry out.  To get angry.  To "all of the above."  It seems to be the battle I am fight throughout this journey.  And if I am honest, I think that God probably is ok with that, knowing how my soul and my heart feel in this wait process.  But I think he also wants us to remember who he is.  I was talking with a friend yesterday who reminded me that we just need to speak the truth about God, what his word says, who he claims to be, and that is what we are to cling to.  I think he would say to me today...I have not forgotten you (Isaiah 49:16).  I know the plans that are perfect for you (Jer. 29:11).  I will sustain you (Isaiah 46:4).  I am with you (Josh. 1:9).  I am strong enough for you (Ps. 9:9-10).  I am faithful (Heb. 11:11).

I was driving home from the high school today and just felt incredibly low.  I looked up and the 18 wheeler in front of me had this verse imprinted on it:  "But those who HOPE in the LORD will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles.  They will run and not grow weary.  They will walk and not be faint."  I just thought about that for a minute.  I believe the day is coming when we will be matched with our forever family.  And I picture that day to be one in which we soar to unbelievable heights out of the gratefulness of this journey.  I am so thankful that even on the days we get dumped on and we feel like we have no options there is a God who specializes in reminding us that he is ALWAYS there, ALWAYS renewing our strength, ALWAYS faithful, and has never forgotten us.

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