Speak Jesus


It's been three weeks since moving our family to a new city, a new church, a new "temporary" house, and far away from what was familiar.  It's only been two weeks working my actual job.  I'm not sure why, but yesterday everything kind of caught up to us.  We had just had a great day as a family visiting our new favorite donut shop (shout out to the Yum Yum Shop), shopping at a discount grocery store that is like a dream world to me, and stopping at the local Walmart for the kids to spend their allowance.  It was a low key family kind of day.  As we drove home, the kids got quiet and Biruk said, "Mom...I miss my friends."

You know those moments when you're supposed to be the "parent" in the situation and remind your kid that it's all going to be ok?  I kind of failed at that, because the truth was, my emotions from the past couple of weeks of leaving one place and starting new in another and found away to surface.  My response to my child...tears.  Truth was, I was missing what was familiar too.

Later that night, as I tucked Biruk into bed, I reminded him what my husband had reminded me earlier that day.  We've just been here a few weeks.  It's going to take time.  You'll make friends, you'll come to love this new place.  I promise it's going to be awesome.

Throughout my life, I have had to make lots of decisions that stretched and challenged me and caused me to rely on a strength that could only come from God.  As I've done more and more life with Jesus, I've realized that everything he asks of us is totally worth it.  So I've just learned to trust him and say yes.

And then we adopted two kids.  We became parents of two little people who would trust us to make the right decision when faced with a hard decision.  I'm not sure why, but the weight of a decision just feels "weightier" when you have little people looking up to you.  It's why we lay awake in the middle of the night second guessing our decisions, trying to calculate how to make everything work out, and attempting to hold it together.

I don't think that Jesus meant for us to carry our burdens or the weight of the world on our shoulders.  In fact, he tells us that throughout scripture.

"Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you.  Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light (Matt. 11:28-30)"

He'll give us rest when we're up at night worrying about our kids.  He'll teach us...the way, what we need, how to live even when we're anxious.  He's humble and gentle...we don't have to fear him.  He'll give us rest for our souls, the kind of rest that meets us in our questions, our doubts, and our fears.  His yoke is easy.  His burden is light.  He is everything we need...especially when it comes to carrying the weight of being a parent.

This morning, as we closed out our service, we sang a song I had never heard.  The words were powerful.

I just want to speak the name of Jesus
Over fear and all anxiety
To every soul held captive by depression
I speak Jesus
Your name is power
Your name is healing
Your name is life
Break every stronghold
Shine through the shadows
Burn like the fire
Shout Jesus from the mountains
Jesus in the streets
Jesus in the darkness over every enemy
Jesus for my family
I speak the holy name
Jesus
("I Speak Jesus" Darlene Zschech, Here Be Lions)

I'm not sure, but in those moments, I felt like the presence of Jesus was so thick.  I stood up with my husband, weeping, our hands raised, as a proclamation that we would speak the name of Jesus over our family, no matter what we face.  We don't have to carry the weight.  He's got us.  We just have to speak his name.



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